Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

So, I tend to catch movies when they're out on video. There's probably some pop-culture term for people like me, but I think the moniker most suitable for me and my ilk are "tightwads."

So, just got around to seeing the latest (final?) Indiana Jones flick. My biggest fear going into it was that Spielberg & Lucas would find some not-so-clever way to turn the baddies into a metaphor for the Bush administration. I'm glad to say they resisted the temptation. This is a real sore subject for me when I happen to care about the franchise or will ever want to see the movie a second time (which is why George Clooney and Tim Robbins can do whatever the hell they want)--I'm sure Lucas thought he was being clever with his pathetic and warped cariacature of Bush in Anakin Skywalker in Star Wars EP III. But all he accomplished was to let the fans down and ensure that his epic would be weakened for all time. Is anyone going to give a damn in 20 years that George Lucas gave a damn about George W. Bush? "Only a Sith speaks in absolutes." What is that? So Jedi are moral relativists, and Sith could be the good guys, depending on your point of view? Why have Obi Wan spout some silly locution even he himself doesn't believe? Why I oughta...

So, suffice it to say, once the flick cleared this first hurdle with me, I was going to be easy to please. Yes, McCarthyism. Yes yes, widespread paranoia, yes overblown anti-red rallies around every corner, yes yes yes. Whatever. If there was ever anti-red hysteria at Yale I must have missed it. But this was a paranthetical.

The story was, mmmmmm, okay. Of all the stories, it was by far the campiest. Indy, and starry-eyed, Marian, and baby Mutt makes three. Awww.

But still. I had fun. I don't expect rigorous intellectual stimulation when I watch an action movie. It might have been a little light on the Professor Jones, archeology geek angle. And it didn't really have that one breathtaking scene like when the sunbeam shines into the subterranean map room and hits the crystal, marking the location of the ark's resting place, or when Indy steps into thin air and lands on the invisible bridge leading into the chalice room, or--my personal favorite--when the host of heaven come down and melt all of the Nazis. Maybe the stuff with the aliens at the end was supposed to be that, but how many alien freakout scenes have we seen by now--and how many by Mr. Spielberg alone? ET was something. This was hackneyed.

But it was good fun nonetheless. At the end of the day, the good guys were the good guys, the commies were commies, the good guy gets the girl, the commies get sucked into another alien dimension--you know, the way they used to make 'em. Cate Blanchett can't help but be awesome. Harrison Ford looked like he hadn't aged a day since the Last Crusade, and gave an excellent, enthusiastic performance (a phone-in was my second biggest fear). John Hurt was fantastic. And best supporting actor should definitely go to the killer ants. I feel happy in reflecting on this movie, which is how movies used to make me feel. I will definitely see this one again.